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Monday, March 30, 2015

Saturday, March 28, 2015

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

"Soup Nazi" part two…

I watched Bobbie slowly make her way around the camp-loop in Sue Bee… headed off to "overflow" to wait out her "sentence." I sat behind Goldie's wheel, trying to calm down some before having a conversation with the rude camp host. In the old days, I would have went in on the offensive, "guns blazing," kinda like in third grade, when I was the biggest kid in class. In the uncivilized adult male world, impertinence often backfires and only serves to escalate hostilities. But when all those chemicals and hormones get released into the bloodstream, it's like cocaine… it feels so good. I tried to think about alternative approaches: maybe this is not as black and white as I'm making it out to be. Maybe Adolph is just having a bad day and will soften up with a gentle approach. 

Sunday, March 22, 2015

The "Soup Nazi:" Authority Complex, Or Just A Bad Day In Paradise?

Thanks to the "Soup Nazi" episode of Seinfeld, we have an unflattering but accurate moniker for antisocial, rule-obsessed authoritarian types in positions of power. I've got a couple of bones to pick in the next couple of posts, starting with an acrimonious Camp Host that verbally venom-ized Bobbie, then the imbecilic Maricopa County Park Merry-Go-Round Regulations that obliterates the joys of camping like a pipe-bomb. Moving on now, from Oak Creek to Cave Creek to Up-a-Creek without a weapon when I really needed one… in the lush, mountain biking Mecca of McDowell Mountain County Park.

Monday, March 16, 2015

Wallowing Around In The Existential Vacuum and Carnality of Camelot: The Internal Dialogue of A Mad Man

The older one gets, the more aware they become of the subtle, insidious acceleration of time. Even though Einstein proved that objects traveling at extremely high rates of speed do not age as fast as their relatively stationary counterparts, it has yet to work for me.

Sunday, March 8, 2015


The trick, and I'm sure Jimmy Carter would agree, is to not allow one's lust to become a verb. As long as it's a noun, you're good to go. 

Friday, March 6, 2015

Lion Sleeps II

Thought I should go ahead and complete our ravishing ramble through Sonoran Desert Déjà Vu. It's been a kind winter here in Arid-zona—wet, like it used to be—as green and lush as I can ever remember. Perhaps if all winters were this rainy, "The Grand Canyon State" would stand a chance of meeting the thirst of its growing suburban sunbelt communities. But we know that's pie-in-the-sky, and you can't eat pie that's in the sky… especially when there isn't water enough for coffee to wash it down.

Thursday, March 5, 2015

The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Sometimes the BCB falls behind. You think we are in Joshua or Village of Oak Creek when, in reality, we are far down the road. But this is a realtime post! We are coming to you live, right here, right now.  Why? Because we had such an awe-inspiring Sonoran Desert hike yesterday that it couldn't wait, I needed to tell someone. 

Sunday, March 1, 2015

Hedonism 101: Why Else Are We Here?

Post Prescott, with its cooling trend forecast, Bobbie and I dropped down in elevation to the glorious red rock country encircling Village of Oak Creek… always an irresistible postcard. We ended up staying a week, walking, hiking, and peddling through odoriferous stands of pinion and cedar—our hearts pulsating with aerobic joy. I know there are some higher consciousness types who like to marginalize "scenery," think it's a frivolous distraction to the real point of life and a general waste of gasoline. Thankfully, people are like jellybeans. They come in assorted colors and have divergent tastes (ideas).